Many people ask me "is there any way I can avoid being eaten by a zombie?" The answer is yes! Below are some helpful tips on how to avoid being eaten by a zombie. This list will be updated whenever we find more useful tips, so check back often!

Never Trust a Zombie
Zombies can't be trusted. Sure, they say you can trust them but they're only after one thing: your brain. If you trust a zombie then you clearly don't need your brain beacuse you aren't using it.

Zombies Aren't Your Friends
Your friends may turn into zombies but you can never be friends with a zombie. You can't trust zombies (see the tip above) and there's no such thing as a Zombie Hombre. Don't do it. Don't be that guy.

Don't Talk To Zombies
Yes, they're lonely. Too bad, they're zombies! Don't belive the rumors on the internet that asking a zombie for directions will distract them long enough for you to get away. They'll just keep after you if only to make sure you get to the right place. And while you're standing there trying to get them to understand that you want south Main Street and not north Main Street another zombie will probably sneak up on you away. Just say no to zombies.

Don't Taunt A Zombie
Yes, you're smarter than a zombie, but not if you're dumb enough to try to prove it by channeling Jeff Foxworthy. There are no extra points for outsmarting a zombie. The only points are for getting away.

Don't Fight A Zombie
You can't beat up a zombie. They don't feel any pain. Unless you behead one the best you can do is knock them down. You're not Bruce Lee. You're not Chuck Norris. You're not Jackie Chan. You're not Jean-Claude Van Damme (not even old, fat, post-plastic surgery Jean-Claude Van Damn!). If anyone asks you why you ran away just tell them you used to fight zombies, but then you took an arrow to the knee.

Don't Look Back
When you're running a way — and you should be running away — don't look back. Zombies are slow and dumb. They can't catch you if you just keep going. Even that lady on her Rascal Scooter can outrun a zombie if she doesn't need to ask for directions.

Don't Fall Down
You see it all the time in horror movies. The person running away falls down and then gets captured, killed and/or eaten. The ground is not your friend, neither is gravity, or zombies, so don't fall down.